Saturday, November 11, 2006

Into the valley of death hopped Ned

There's some backstory to this: Back when Miami and Florida International had their footbll brawl, there was a photo of the fight taken that showed a FIU player on crutches, wearing baggy jorts (jean shorts), limping into the fray with the name "NED" on his jersey.

Turns out Ned really is his last name, though it sure seems like a first name (his first name is A'Mond, which sounds much more like a last name), and the folks at Deadspin are now having a helluva time Photoshopping Ned crutching his way into famous battles and writing verse about him. It's gotten way out of hand and is now quite hilarious. Check it out here.

My favorite lines:

"Has there ever been a more disinterested observer of a life-or-death brawl than Ned?"

"Theirs not to make reply, Theirs not to reason why, Theirs but to do and die: Into the valley of Death hopped Ned."

"We shall fight on the beaches, especially South Beach, we shall fight in the clubs, we shall fight in the alleys and in the streets, we shall fight in the motherfucking OB; we shall never surrender."

And that famous "Footprints" story, rewritten to be about Ned.

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