Oh, awesome. Forget "American Idol," forget "The Sopranos": A new season of "Bridezillas" launches today on WE. And my pal Andy reports that this season, one gets left at the altar. Yipes.
My TiVo offered up a short preview, and here are the highlights:
--Bride on way to bachelorette party screaming at bridesmaid who's driving
--Bride getting pedicure who says "Can I hold the remote control, because I like to be in control."
--Bride who says "all I need is for them to walk down the aisle and get outta my way"
--Bride dressed like 1940s cigarette girl who says "this veil is making me dizzy!" (she obviously was already dizzy, if you know what I mean)
--Bride in full gown/veil in back of car on cell phone who says "We are NOT getting married today."
--Bakersfield wedding with weirdly half-painted fence and crabby bride named Alicia who guzzles Pepto and says "I don't think a bride should have to set up for her own wedding" and then yells at a bridesmaid who didn't wash the marbles in the vases (?) while other bridesmaids run around cleaning everything. She says "some bridesmaids were all aboard the train, while others fell off."
--This same bride yells "I need attention! I NEED ATTENTION!" and then complains "I don't think I got as much attention as I should have from my bridesmaids." She then tells one "And you haven't even said how pretty I look yet." This to a smart bridesmaid who just laughs in her face! These maids do have super-pretty sky blue tea-length gowns, but I can't blame the maid of honor when she kind of YANKS Alicia into her strapless wedding dress. Heh.
--Someone they introduce as our "blitzed bridezilla" has to transport 38 cakes (what? why?) to the church (the church?). she and her maid are in some little red sports car and the drunk bride can't hand it to the undrunk maid, so it falls and the bride screams at the bridesmaid. Also, these are NOT what you think of as wedding cake layers. They are like a cake you would make with a box mix when you are 13 and can't frost very well. They look the same after they fall as before. But the bride has a fit anyway and screams at the maid to drive her somewhere.
Oh, this show is shaping up for another awesome season.