The violent history of Candyland. Awesome.
Excerpt: "The gumdrops got tired of being killed and so they went over to where the peppermints lived and knocked them around a little. Some of the peppermints they knocked around hadn't actually done anything, but neither had most of the gumdrops the peppermints had killed, so they figured that it all evened out in the end. The peppermints disagreed, but their method of expressing this was to kill more gumdrops, so the gumdrops didn't much care what they thought."